Tuesday, December 20, 2011

This Christmas Could Change Your Life

LIFEadvice: How this Christmas could change your life
By Kimberly Giles, ksl.com Contributor
December 20th, 2011 @ 8:33pm
nativity_shutterstock.jpg

The Christmas season always encourages more loving thoughts – at least for a few weeks. I’d like to share an idea that might make your “Christmas attitude change” last a little longer.

I encourage you to take a closer look at the story of Christ’s birth this year. Even if you are not religious, there was an important message delivered that night in Bethlehem, which you may have missed.

The moment Christ was born the angels appeared to shepherds watching their flocks by night. The angels delivered this often overlooked message of Christmas in the first two words they said.

They said, Fear not… For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, which is Christ the Lord.”

What you may have missed are these words: Fear not.”

It is only when you have no fear that the best you can show up. Love happens when you stop worrying about proving your value and focus on edifying others instead.

I used to think the angels said “Fear not” because the appearance of Heavenly personages may have startled the poor shepherds and they were worried about frightening them — but now I think the words have deeper meaning.

Our journey through mortality is a scary endeavor. Before the Savior's birth and subsequent sacrifice on the cross, it was also a journey without hope. We had no hope of returning to live with God. Life was a testing center and even one mistake meant failing the test.

We had much to fear.

The angels, because they understood this concept, knew that Christ’s birth marked the end of that fear. Mankind was now safe. Christ and his sacrifice would change life from a testing center into a classroom. Now we could approach life without the fear of failing.

Think about what that means.

How would your life be different if you had no fear?

Because of Christ, your journey is now a safe one. When you make a mistake (which happens daily), you can repent and try again. You can keep repenting, trying, learning and growing throughout your life with no fear about not making the grade. Your life is a classroom.

Now, you can focus on the lessons each experience is here to teach you and know your value is not on the line. You have nothing to fear about not being good enough. You are good enough right now, through Christ.

Whew.

Even if you don't believe in Jesus Christ, this can completely change your attitude toward every part of your life because, as it is, you spend way too much time worrying about not being good enough.

All of your immature or selfish behavior is tied to this fear. This fear is the reason you lose your temper, say unkind things or decide to protect yourself instead of serving someone else. Fear is involved in all of your problems.

When you are afraid you’re not good enough, your focus is on you. You are worried about getting love and validation. This insecurity is a selfish place to live from. In this state you cannot build healthy relationships because you can’t really focus on other people.

If your marriage is struggling, fear is most likely the problem. Both parties may be focused on getting love instead of giving it. If your marriage is drowning in fear, there can be no love.

You cannot have love and fear at the same time. They are opposites. You can either feel scared and focus on you, or you can feel safe and focus on others. It’s an either/or situation.

Who do you want to be? A scared person or a loving one?

It is only when you have no fear that the best you can show up. In a state of no fear, you can genuinely love and serve other people. Love happens when you stop worrying about proving your value and focus on edifying others instead.

My wish for you this Christmas is that you will accept Christ and do as the angels said and “fear not.”

Go forward into this New Year with confidence and peace. You have nothing to fear.

Your value is infinite and absolute. You don’t need attention or validation from others. You know who you are. Focus on giving love and validation to others and edify people wherever you go instead.

Stop trying to earn your value through your appearance, your work or the things you own. These are not who you are. Focus on being the love in every room instead. Your love for other people is who you are.

Everywhere you go, look for opportunities for random acts of kindness. Make this year the year you lead with love. Let this Christmas message change your attitude all year long.

This one change could change your life.

Merry Christmas.

Kimberly Giles is the founder and president of www.ldslifecoaching.com and www.claritypointcoaching.com. She is a sought after life coach and speaker. Watch her LIFEadvice segments on KSL TV Monday mornings at 6:15am

Oh, Blog! I've been Neglecting You...

Sometimes it is so easy to get hung up on everything else that has been going on--I forget to focus on the truly important things in my life. I had a chance to look through some pictures...and I missed the extended Blog2Print sale. (I am three years behind in printing out our family blog). It did get me looking back at this past year and wonder where it all went and how Baby and the Kiddos grew up so fast!?
Favorite picture from last Christmas:
"Say, who is this fat man in red and why is he holding me!?..." 2011 Update "Get me off this strange man, Daddy!" "Oh, and Santa--I want a playhouse and a baby doll and..." (Shy Princess isn't shy this year) And brother had all kinds of requests...like a self-portrait of Santa put in his room, along with a few small gifts (put in his room-NOT by the fireplace, Lego Heroes, etc.)

Friday, December 16, 2011

Mom, You Got it all Wrong!

"Mom, you got it all wrong! These flip flops are perfect for winter! I just went outside and checked it out, "says Princess (in her almost five but thinks she's twenty-five voice). There you have it folks. Parents--YOU ARE WRONG! Flip flops are perfectly acceptable in the Rocky Mountains in mid December in below freezing temperatures but with no snow, especially--if they match a headband and flower bag...

What Your Teenager Asked Me to Tell You

What your teenagers asked me to tell you
By Brandon Comstock, ksl.com contributor
December 16th, 2011 @ 10:53am
shutterstock_60192856.jpg
Related Links

SALT LAKE CITY -- For a teen, the basic goals of relating with parents are not all that different from your typical prisoner of war: First, give up as little information as possible, and second, do your best to endure whatever punishment might come your way. Parents, of course, are the dreaded interrogator. They dish out threats like, “If you ever want to see the light of day again, you’ll do what I say!” and use a variety of methods to make their message clear, like, “Play by my rules, or I’m going to make your life miserable.”

At least that’s how we as adults think they see it.

Recently, however, I got a unique chance to slip behind enemy lines and listen in on what a group of teens had to say about their relationship with you, their parents. While some of their peers may find their actions traitorous, they asked me to deliver a message back across the lines to you, their parents.

Recently, however, I got a unique chance to slip behind enemy lines and listen in on what a group of teens had to say about their relationship with you, their parents. While some of their peers may find their actions traitorous, they asked me to deliver a message back across the lines to you, their parents.

As a high school teacher, I'm generally on the same side of the fence as you are when it comes to students' opinions about opening up, but as I sat with this relatively diverse group of students one day, I was surprised to hear the unity of the voices that spoke. Whether they were a football captain or a math club president, the most popular kid in school or a social outcast, their message was the same: "We want to talk."

Now, before you think that this message is simply unbelievable, let me add on a bit of a qualifier: They also said that they want you to start.

Their shocking confessions came following a question that even I thought would yield wildly different results. At the conclusion of a class I was teaching, I simply asked them, “What do you wish your parents knew that you don’t want to tell them?” It didn’t take long for them to start shelling out advice for me to pass along.

The first girl to speak up responded, “I want them to push me. I need them too. When my parents pushed me in math I did well, but when they stopped, I lost the motivation and my grades dropped.”

As I looked around the room I saw a myriad of head nods that seemed to say, “Yep, we agree.” Still, I was skeptical, so I put it to a vote. I asked, “How many of you wish your parents would push you harder to achieve?” About two-thirds of the 30 hands went up. I was shocked, but, like a cool-headed interrogator, I decided not to show it.

I simply asked them, "What do you wish your parents knew that you don't want to tell them?" It didn't take long for them to start shelling out advice for me to pass along.

With very little delay another student raised his hand and, slowly, carefully choosing his words, said, “Sometimes, I just wish they would show some more interest in what I’m doing; you know, ask me some questions about it and stuff.”

Unsure what he meant, I pressed it a little. “What types of things are you talking about?” I asked.

“You know, like what I’m doing and where I’m going and stuff,” he answered.

Again, I was a little surprised; after all, this goes against everything I have been trained to believe as a parent/interrogator. So again, I asked the class what they thought.

I asked, “How many of you wish your parents would ask you more questions about what you’re doing and talk to you more?” This time, the number was higher: Almost three-quarters of the students raised their hands to agree.

Now before you get to jumping to conclusions and justifying away why your child is nothing like the 30 students I talked to in that class — or the several hundred I have had a chance to ask the same questions — who have given me the same answers since then, I need to make sure I tell you about the most important question they answered for me.

To put it bluntly, I was shocked and confused at the answers I had heard from my students, so I asked one final question to see if it was simply an error in my questioning: “If your parents were to do the things you just said you want them to do, how many of you would roll your eyes at them and act irritated that they would even ask?”

With the unanimity of a perfectly choreographed dance routine, their hands shot into the air to indicate that, indeed, they would.

If your parents were to do the things you just said you want them to do, how many of you would roll your eyes at them and act irritated that they would even ask? With the unanimity of a perfectly choreographed dance routine, their hands shot into the air to indicate that, indeed, they would.

Sensing my perplexity, a girl on the third row spoke up and said, “We’re teenagers, it’s our job.” Her response got a chuckle and, again, heads nodded in agreement as the students cleaned up their books and headed for the door with a smile.

Before they got away, I threw out one last question: "Are you OK if I tell your parents all of this?" One student replied, "Sure, someone has to, because we're not going to!"

So remember, even though the roles of interrogator and POW are not likely to change any time soon, don't despair, there's still hope. Just keep asking those questions, even if you do keep getting those irritated looks and eye rollings. After all, we're parents, it’s our job.

Let There Be Christmas!

Anonymous donors pay strangers' layaway accounts
By Margery A. Beck, Associated Press
December 16th, 2011 @ 9:34am

Associated Press

OMAHA, Neb. (AP) - The young father stood in line at the Kmart layaway counter, wearing dirty clothes and worn-out boots. With him were three small children.

He asked to pay something on his bill because he knew he wouldn't be able to afford it all before Christmas. Then a mysterious woman stepped up to the counter.

"She told him, `No, I'm paying for it,'" recalled Edna Deppe, assistant manager at the store in Indianapolis. "He just stood there and looked at her and then looked at me and asked if it was a joke. I told him it wasn't, and that she was going to pay for him. And he just busted out in tears."

At Kmart stores across the country, Santa is getting some help: Anonymous donors are paying off strangers' layaway accounts, buying the Christmas gifts other families couldn't afford, especially toys and children's clothes set aside by impoverished parents.

Before she left the store Tuesday evening, the Indianapolis woman in her mid-40s had paid the layaway orders for as many as 50 people. On the way out, she handed out $50 bills and paid for two carts of toys for a woman in line at the cash register.

"She was doing it in the memory of her husband who had just died, and she said she wasn't going to be able to spend it and wanted to make people happy with it," Deppe said. The woman did not identify herself and only asked people to "remember Ben," an apparent reference to her husband.

Deppe, who said she's worked in retail for 40 years, had never seen anything like it.

"It was like an angel fell out of the sky and appeared in our store," she said.

Most of the donors have done their giving secretly.

Dona Bremser, an Omaha nurse, was at work when a Kmart employee called to tell her that someone had paid off the $70 balance of her layaway account, which held nearly $200 in toys for her 4-year-old son.

"I was speechless," Bremser said. "It made me believe in Christmas again."

Dozens of other customers have received similar calls in Nebraska, Michigan, Iowa, Indiana and Montana.

The benefactors generally ask to help families who are squirreling away items for young children. They often pay a portion of the balance, usually all but a few dollars or cents so the layaway order stays in the store's system.

The phenomenon seems to have begun in Michigan before spreading, Kmart executives said.

"It is honestly being driven by people wanting to do a good deed at this time of the year," said Salima Yala, Kmart's division vice president for layaway.

The good Samaritans seem to be visiting mainly Kmart stores, though a Wal-Mart spokesman said a few of his stores in Joplin, Mo., and Chicago have also seen some layaway accounts paid off.

Kmart representatives say they did nothing to instigate the secret Santas or spread word of the generosity. But it's happening as the company struggles to compete with chains such as Wal-Mart and Target.

Kmart may be the focus of layaway generosity, Yala said, because it is one of the few large discount stores that has offered layaway year-round for about four decades. Under the program, customers can make purchases but let the store hold onto their merchandise as they pay it off slowly over several weeks.

The sad memories of layaways lost prompted at least one good Samaritan to pay off the accounts of five people at an Omaha Kmart, said Karl Graff, the store's assistant manager.

"She told me that when she was younger, her mom used to set up things on layaway at Kmart, but they rarely were able to pay them off because they just didn't have the money for it," Graff said.

He called a woman who had been helped, "and she broke down in tears on the phone with me. She wasn't sure she was going to be able to pay off their layaway and was afraid their kids weren't going to have anything for Christmas."

"You know, 50 bucks may not sound like a lot, but I tell you what, at the right time, it may as well be a million dollars for some people," Graff said.

Graff's store alone has seen about a dozen layaway accounts paid off in the last 10 days, with the donors paying $50 to $250 on each account.

"To be honest, in retail, it's easy to get cynical about the holidays, because you're kind of grinding it out when everybody else is having family time," Graff said. "It's really encouraging to see this side of Christmas again."

Lori Stearnes of Omaha also benefited from the generosity of a stranger who paid all but $58 of her $250 layaway bill for toys for her four youngest grandchildren.

Stearnes said she and her husband live paycheck to paycheck, but she plans to use the money she was saving for the toys to help pay for someone else's layaway.

In Missoula, Mont., a man spent more than $1,200 to pay down the balances of six customers whose layaway orders were about to be returned to a Kmart store's inventory because of late payments.

Store employees reached one beneficiary on her cellphone at Seattle Children's Hospital, where her son was being treated for an undisclosed illness.

"She was yelling at the nurses, `We're going to have Christmas after all!'" store manager Josine Murrin said.

A Kmart in Plainfield Township, Mich., called Roberta Carter last week to let her know a man had paid all but 40 cents of her $60 layaway.

Carter, a mother of eight from Grand Rapids, Mich., said she cried upon hearing the news. She and her family have been struggling as she seeks a full-time job.

"My kids will have clothes for Christmas," she said.

Angie Torres, a stay-at-home mother of four children under the age of 8, was in the Indianapolis Kmart on Tuesday to make a payment on her layaway bill when she learned the woman next to her was paying off her account.

"I started to cry. I couldn't believe it," said Torres, who doubted she would have been able to pay off the balance. "I was in disbelief. I hugged her and gave her a kiss."

___

Associated Press writers Michael J. Crumb in Des Moines, Iowa; Matt Volz, in Helena, Mont.; and Jeff Karoub in Detroit contributed to this report.

(Copyright 2011 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.)

Found this Funny--(Don't Take it too Seriously)

Prospective student asks about USU's 'Mormon problem'

Published: Thursday, November 3, 2005

Updated: Monday, August 9, 2010 14:08

Editor's note: This is an actual letter that was sent to a Statesman editor. It is printed below exactly as it originally appeared. Following the letter are some of the statements two of our columnists responded with.

Hi, I am a student looking at Utah State University as my college of choice. Right now I am a senior in highschool. I am looking into a major in engineering. I have visited the college and I love the campus, but my main concern is something you cant exactly take a tour of ... Mormons! I live in a very Mormon town in Idaho. I am not Mormon my self. I personally do not care for them, and sometimes get very annoyed at their goodie-goodie ness. Maybe you could answer a couple questions about USU? Please understand I am not trying to offend anyone, I just want some straight answers. I have heard USU is a second BYU Provo, is this true? On a scale of 1 to 10 (10 is the most) how 'Mormon' is the student body? What is the party life like? Are the parties ever very big? Are any of the frats considered wild? What is underage drinking like? Are Mormons in your face all the time? Are you going to get weird looks on campus if you are doing something Mormons wouldn't agree with? eg a short skirt on a girl. What are the ladies like - be honest, are they typical stuck-up Mormon daddies girls? Do girls try to pressure you into getting married, should one date a Mormon girl? Are there any big rivalries in football/soccer or other sports? I don't play to major in partying, I just want to have the old college experience of attending my fair share of parties, and getting plenty drunk along the way. Thanks, Steve ps I got your email through a google search, i'm not a stalker or anything.

Steve: We think you've touched on some very important issues. Mormons, as a whole, are a huge concern around thse parts. Check the nooks. Check the crannies. Check under every rock in the riverbed. There are Mormons there. They are everywhere. You cannot escape them. To answer your questions ...

I have heard USU is a second BYU Provo, is this true?

• Sadly. No. USU is the first BYU Provo. Founded by Wilford Woodruff in the late 1890s, USU is funded entirely by a Mormon polygamist splinter faction. Besides, we're actually more like BYU-Hawaii, only replace the beaches of golden sand and clear water with a valley filled with fog, smog and trog and replace the the BY with US.

On a scale of 1 to 10 (10 is the most) how 'Mormon' is the student body?

• The hot Mormons usually rank around a 10. The ones with "sweet spirits" are usually more around a 2 or a 3. We usually add an extra point if she has red hair but that's just us. That's the coolest thing about USU; we let you come up with your own system to rank other students' Mormon bodies.

What is the party life like?

• There are plenty of opportunities to "cut loose" and a "have a good time" while remembering who you are, choosing the right and returning with honor. Still, ever seen "Animal House?" Ever seen "Johnny Lingo?" It's pretty much a cross between the two.

Are the parties ever very big?

• No one rocks harder than God.

Are any of the frats considered wild?

• Nah, they used to be but they started coming closer and closer to town, and folks started feeding them people food. Now they can't fend for themselves in the wild. It's kinda sad but we are setting up a reserve for them.

What is underage drinking like?

• A lot like drinking when you're of age, only illegal. It's also like driving when you're fourteen. You think you're cool, but every one older thinks you're a dork.

Are Mormons in your face all the time?

• As a non-Mormon, you will probably have to fight a few off. But don't worry, they're generally not physically strong and can be taken down with a simple punch to the throat, or kick to the groin. Also, holy water and garlic can fend most of them off.

Are you going to get weird looks on campus if you are doing something Mormons wouldn't agree with? eg a short skirt

• Steve, we don't care where are in the world. You shouldn't be wearing a short skirt. Come on man. You're better than that.

What are the ladies like - be honest, are they typical stuck-up Mormon daddies girls?

• Some girls come from polygamist households, which can result in the most serious of daddy issues. But the remainder of ladies (Mormon or not) ... that's a subject we are experts on. The ladies talk a lot. We're not sure about what. We also know they smell better than guys, have curves where we don't and get lost easily. They usually have soft hands.

Do girls try to pressure you into getting married, should one date a Mormon girl?

• Don't you watch sitcoms or read the funnies? Women are always tyring to get you to marry them. This is just part of life you're gonna need to get used to. Once chicks graduate high school they instantly begin looking for the ring. They that their hotness only lasts for so long and are looking to wrap you in while they can.

Are there any big rivalries in football/soccer or other sports?

• Football and soccer hate each other. It dates back hundreds of years to the time when what we call football s ole the name from what we now call soccer. Soccer's been pissed about it ever since. As for other sports: hockey hates basketball, wrestling hates boxing and lacrosse pretty much hates everyobdy else. What's with the off topic questions? Let's stick to stuff about USU.

As far as not wanting to major in partying, you should major in Spanish and minor in partying. And keep in mind your "fair share" of parties is two. Anymore than that and you're just being greedy.

Good luck, Steve, and godspeed.

Aaron Falk and Steve Shinney are both editors and columnists at the Utah Statesman. Comments, as well your own responses to Steve, can be sent to acf@cc.usu.edu, steveshinney@cc.usu.edu.

Sunday, November 27, 2011

Artist Girls Win at Reflections Contest

Artist Girl at the recent PTA Reflections Contest 2011 Assembly.
(Yes, that is a food bribe in the babies mouth--long assembly)

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Self Portrait by Artist Girl

We have been weathering one sickness after another around here since I "tricked" on Halloween with walking pneumonia, bronchitis, and sinusitis. Stomach bug has brought more unpleasantness. 6 down so far, 1 to go. Artist girl has not and claims she will not fall victim to the bug. She has been working on the above self-portrait sketch. What do you think? (She is 11)

Thursday, November 10, 2011

10 Ways Moms Can Boost Self-Confidence

10 ways moms can boost self-confidence
By Tequitia Andrews, ksl.com contributor
November 9th, 2011 @ 7:33pm
shutterstock_mother-daughter.jpg

SALT LAKE CITY -- Being a mom is hard work. And, unfortunately, moms are their own harshest critics. Feelings of inadequacy or attempting to keep up with societal demands can lead to depression and low self-worth. By incorporating a few new habits and developing a different perspective, moms can feel more confident — and enjoy the journey.

1. Dress the Part

Mom and frumpy does not have to be synonomous. While it isn't necessary to get a total makeover, it is a good idea to take a little pride in your appearance.

2. Eat Healthy and Exercise

A poor diet and lack of physical activity can put a strain on the body and your mood. Moms who eat healthy and exercise regularly feel and look better.

3. Ignore the "Joneses"

Constantly comparing yourself to others can lead to depression and feelings of inadequacies. Make realistic goals for your family based on your circumstances and needs.

4. Create a Mantra

Find a quote, scripture or affirmative statement that embodies how you want to be. Look at it or repeat it in your mind every time you feel inadequate. What we think about ourselves can have a positive or negative affect on how we live. Think confidently, live confidently.

5. Celebrate Your Successes

No matter how small the success may be, celebrate. It's easy to dwell on how much of the to-do list is still left undone. Instead, celebrate the accomplishments that you have achieved.

6. Focus on Your Strengths

As in number 5, it's easy to get caught up in your weaknesses. Focus on what you're good at and pace yourself to improve in the areas you're not. Don't beat yourself up over it. Accept who and where you are.

7. Pursue Personal Interests

Take some time during the week to do something for you. It can be taking a class, reading a book or a hobby.

8. Help Others

No doubt about it, helping others feels good. It also takes the focus off ourselves and our perceived inadequacies.

9. Avoid Negativity

Avoid negative people and negative media that foster feelings of inadequacy. Surround yourself with people and media that are uplifting, inspiring and encouraging.

10. Enjoy Life

Enjoy your family and everyday that you have together. Seek out opportunities to have fun and create meaningful memories.

Tequitia Andrews has written about parenting and family issues for several newspapers, magazines and websites.

Sunday, November 6, 2011

Disaster Supply Car Kit

How to make a disaster supply car kit
By The Provident Princess, ksl.com contributor
November 6th, 2011 @ 9:49am
shutterstock_57476518.jpg

SALT LAKE CITY -- The probability of a disaster happening while you are away from home is very high. So an important component of any emergency preparedness plan would include having a well-stocked car.

There are also times when you may need to evacuate or be stranded in your car. Having your car stocked to help you survive will give you a lot more peace of mind and help you stay calm and focus on the important things in these situations.

Prepare your car now by keeping your gas tank above half-full, always check the weather and road conditions before a trip and keep up on your car's maintenance.

Since you may not be at home and may not have the chance to go back and get your disaster supplies kits (72-hour kits or grab bags), you will want to keep a smaller version in the trunks of each of your cars.

Car Kits might include:

  • First aid kit and manual
  • Flashlight and extra batteries
  • Cellphone, charger
  • Roadside assistance card
  • Portable radio and extra batteries
  • Fire extinguisher (five-pound ABC type)
  • Extra fuses
  • List of important phone numbers (local and out-of-town)
  • Detailed maps
  • Waterproof matches and candles
  • Whistle and small mirror
  • Pen, pencils, paper
  • Cash (bills and coins)
  • Flares or hazard reflectors
  • Jumper cables
  • Properly inflated spare tire
  • Jack, lug wrench, tire gauge
  • Basic tool kit
  • Windshield scraper and brush
  • Small folding shovel
  • Duct tape
  • Sand for traction
  • Rags, paper towels, wet wipes, and diapers if you have small kids
  • Water (for drinking and in case your car overheats)
  • Bleach
  • Nonperishable food (focus on high energy) also you may want a bottle and formula if you have a baby
  • Hand can opener
  • Medications
  • Toiletries
  • Emergency blankets, hand warmers
  • Extra clothes, gloves, hats, sturdy shoes

Perhaps some of these ideas get you thinking about what you might need to prepare your car for emergencies and disasters that could happen.

I would love to hear about any ideas you might have in addition to what I have listed.

A great resource to review is FEMA's website you can find it at http://www.fema.gov/

You can find more information and tips about food storage, emergency preparedness and provident living by visiting my blog at http://providentprincess.com/< a=""> src="http://beacon.deseretconnect.com/beacon.gif?cid=14593&pid=4" /><>

Crack Brownies

Another recipe to try: Crack Brownies You can find the original entry here.

Turn your oven to 350 degrees.

In a 3- or 4-quart saucepan, melt a stick-and-a-half of butter with 2 ounces of unsweetened chocolate. Since these are The Best Ever Brownies you should use the highest-quality chocolate (and butter!) that you can find, though I’ll whisper to you behind my hand that a batch I made using Baker’s, which is basically the Alpo of the unsweetened chocolate world, was met with oohs and aahs and a whole lot of paws surreptitiously darting toward the plate for just one more, I swear this is my last one OH MY GOODNESS, I CAN’T STOP, WHAT IS IN THESE THINGS?!?

Once those two things are melted, turn the heat off and move the pot to a cold burner to let it cool down for a spell.

Now stir in the following things:

A heaping ¼ cup of cocoa powder 2 cups of sugar 3 eggs 2 teaspoons vanilla 1 cup flour

When that’s all nicely mixed, pour the batter into a 8”x8” square pan that you’ve lined with greased foil such that the foil drapes over the edges of the pan.

That’s pretty much it, except for the secret part. The crack part. Have you guessed yet what it is?

It is salt.

But not just any salt. Maldon salt. Himalayan pink salt also works, as does Sel Gris. Kosher salt does not work; neither does table salt. You need rocks, Jenny from the block. About a teaspoon of ‘em, but kind of eyeball it, giving the top of the brownie batter a pretty good coating with the stuff. Once you’ve done that, put the pan in the oven, let everything bake for 30-35 minutes before cooling for one hour at room temperature, followed by one hour in the refrigerator. Cut them into 16ths.

Self-esteem

Self-esteem can be fleeting, but it's worth the pursuit
By Roger Stark, ksl.com contributor
November 3rd, 2011 @ 8:04pm
happy.jpg

SALT LAKE CITY — The great American psychologist Albert Ellis once said, “Self-esteem is the greatest sickness known to man or woman because it is conditional.” Indeed, the finding of a healthy self- esteem is the greatest mental health challenge many face in their lifetime.

Individual worth (and the self-esteem that is harvested from it) is not situational and should not be established by comparison, evaluation or an individual's last great or terrible accomplishment. Those are the conditional elements Ellis was referring to. They are often not within an individual’s control.

“Life happens,” as the street therapist would say, prompting many to throw up their hands and accept whatever fate they're dealt without fighting for a happier life. But experts say creating lasting self- esteem is possible and worth the effort to build. These experts offer guiding principles for those struggling to understand and foster their own sense of self-worth.

Self-esteem in a dog-eat-dog world
In a world that is quick to remind us of our faults, and even capitalize on them, we need to find ways to strengthen our self- esteem and to guard carefully the self-esteem of others. We can so easily damage another person's self-esteem, in this dog-eat-dog world. But instead of tearing others down, we can focus on building them up. In turn, this builds up our own personal feelings of worth. CLICK HERE to read more from therapist and Studio 5 relationship expert Matt Townsend.

Russel Seigenberg, Ph.D., of Logan, suggests, “The ideal state is to have a sense of self-worth based upon the universal worth of mankind, an appreciation of our own strengths and progress and acceptance of our earnest efforts to walk a good walk in life.”

W. Tim Gallwey authored “The Inner Game of Tennis” outlining just how players could get their mental and emotional selves out of the way, freeing the player within to compete at the highest possible level.

He used the following metaphor: “When we plant a rose seed in the earth, we notice that it is small, but do not criticize it as 'rootless and stemless.' We treat it as a seed, giving it the water and nourishment required of a seed. When it first shoots up out of the earth, we don't condemn it as immature and underdeveloped; nor do we criticize the buds for not being open when they appear. We stand in wonder at the process taking place and give the plant the care it needs at each stage of its development. The rose is a rose from the time it is a seed to the time it dies. Within it, at all times, it contains its whole potential. It seems to be constantly in the process of change; yet at each state, at each moment, it is perfectly right as it is.”

Gallwey wanted his clients to learn that in the big picture, their flaws did not define them or represent failure. He also wanted them to celebrate (and use and focus on) their strengths.

In his years of coaching, Gallwey observed that physical talent levels often did not dictate winning results on the court. He would say to his players, “Learn to trust yourself on the court. Find the state of 'relaxed concentration' that allows you to play at your best” and “Focus your mind to overcome nervousness and self-doubt.” His directions are not only valuable for tennis players, they are great life skills.

10 statements you should never think

In the rose metaphor, Gallwey takes the long-term, big-picture view, as does Seigenberg. He suggests human beings have value simply because they are human beings, whatever their stage of development. He describes it as “the universal worth of mankind.”

In the world of living things, humans are the pre-eminent species, combined with individual “strengths and progress.” each soul has unique value and ability to contribute to making his or her part of the world a better place. Their contribution would be missed if they were not there. If one chooses to earnestly make an effort to walk a good walk in life, individual worth is greatly enhanced. There is much to appreciate, celebrate and admire.

Even when the individual struggles, self-worth need not be diminished. An individual's worth remains constant. Mistakes and failures -- the stages where the human seedling is not particularly beautiful -- are part of being human, and often provide the greatest learning experiences. These are the moments of potential growth and nurturing. Painful as they can be, they serve to move the individual along the path of maturation. A child should not be shamed by his or her mistakes; they are often just benchmarks of growing up. So it is for adults.

Remember the rose. It is not very handsome as a scraggily root, but it is exactly as it should be.

In the process of recovering from addiction Roger Stark became a licensed addiction counselor and wrote the LDS recovery guide, “The Waterfall Concept, A Blueprint for Addiction Recovery.” He blogs at his recovery website, www.waterfallconcept

Saturday, October 29, 2011

Tweens and Teens Halloween Parties

Just Dance 2.
Drama Queen, Tori, and Emma.

Tonight our teen, Drama Queen, and her younger sister, Artist, held simultaneous Halloween Parties at our house. (Joe and I are new to this scene.) Drama lit candles and tea lights (hundreds!) all over the house. She had a couple of friends come and watch Vanhellsing, a vampire movie. Artist had four close friends come and watch Goonies, paint fingernails like Jack-o-Lanterns, glitter nails, or in neon, and putting in long hair feathers.

We provided the Papa Murphey's pizza, bread sticks, pumpkin punch (pumpkin, apple and white grape juices, spice, and some Sprite Zero), and caramel apple supplies.

We used the recipe from Our Best Bites. You can find it here: Gourmet Caramel Apples

Little Baby said her first Family Prayer aloud tonight. It went mostly like this: Say Dear Heavenly Father. Dear. We thank Thee. Say Thank you. Thank you. For Daddy. Daddy For Mommy. Mommy For Hannah. Hannah. For Rebekah. Bebah For Jonathan. (Nothing) For Susie. Susie. For Eva. Evie. Baby. Baby. Amen. (Silence. Big smile).

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Halloween Pizza Fondue Recipe

Halloween Night Pizza Fondue Recipe ½ cup finely chopped onion ¼ cup finely chopped green bell pepper 1 Tbsp butter 2 ½ cups pizza sauce 1 cup (4 oz) shredded mozzarella cheese ½ cup finely chopped pepperoni ½ cup parmesan cheese 1 tsp Italian seasonings Breadstick or bread cubes Small (4 lb?) Sugar pumpkin In a small sauce pan, sauté onion and green peppers in butter until tender. Stir in remaining ingredients. Cook and stir over medium heat until dip is heated through and cheese is melted. Serve with breadsticks or bread cubes. Yields: 3 cups. For a fun twist, serve in a pumpkin. Buy a pumpkin pie pumpkin. Cut off the top and remove the seeds. On an ungreased baking dish, bake the pumpkin, with the lid on, in the oven at 350° for about 20 – 25 minutes, or until hot. Then spoon the pizza fondue into the pumpkin. Replace the lid and serve! I watched this video on FB posted by a cousin and friend, Jodi Clayton. It is done by some friends of hers, Becky Jenkins Wursten and you can watch a video-mercial on how to make it step by step here. The ingredients look like something my children would eat and have fun with.

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Picture Day

This morning was school picture day. Actually, it was Retake day. It brought up bad memories of your own school picture day, didn't it?! Anyway, it entailed me getting four little ones dressed in something clean and somewhat similar, washing faces, doing hair, finding the lost hair flower, finding the lost picture packet, etc. You get the idea. Speaking to my scout, "It's school picture day. (I am helping him take off the dirty knit shirt he has on and putting another clean shirt on over his head while saying this)." "Please just wash your face and your glasses, and fix your hair and you'll be done!" I say. His response, "Whaaa-ht!? I don't want to wash ALL that!" *Sigh*. After getting back from the school I am out $86 for two children's school packets and a simple head shot of the other two preschoolers. Princess smiled, even after practically crawling into my pants while waiting for her turn in front of a line of students, for a piece of bubble gum I had promised her she could chew after her photo. Too bad gum bribes don't work for baby! (Or maybe they would--no, I won't even go there yet!) Baby sat with trepidation and the guy waited so long to say anything (insert "smile!"?) that she got scared and then teared up until the lights flashed. Her photo is of her looking up-not smiling-not bawling either. Ahh--what $20 will buy! Reflecting on this day, I hope looking back at these school photos in frames on the bottom of the bannister, it will all be worth it!

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Two Dollar Tuesdays

Will be posted (8/30/11)
Do the Campbells (and some cousins) weigh as much as a Dinosaur?
BOYS! Have you met our new puppy? She loves her leash!
Free baby cone is just right!
Amy invited us up to Thanksgiving Point again this year because in August each event is only $2. on Tuesdays. We met with Joe and tried our hand at Trilobite hunting (the "big" kids that is) and did quite well. Amy took the younger ones (Princess and Baby) to the Petting Zoo and Farm part. They had fun! Jonathan and Rebekah, meanwhile, found some great trilobites (and some found by others might have been "rediscovered" in our shared bucket of treasures). Joe found some unusual ones that had one of the female workers there asking him questions as to where he found the ones he uncovered. We met back together with Amy and the younger children and had a picnic dinner on the grass under a tree shade canopy. Of course, we toured the Dinosaur Museum and then had a quick stop to get ice cream to make it a great family experience.