Thinking...as I continue to heal from the emergency c-section at Eva's birth.
Knowing...I can no longer "pretend" or hide from acknowledging the pain while embracing the joyful outcome of a surgical ending to my labor and birth.
Healing...with a physical scar that still has random phantom pain, a foot that still has issues of Plantar Fasciitis, bilateral numbness down my hips since the surgery, and emotional bittersweet feelings of deep gratitude conflicting with feelings of failure, incompetency, and helplessness.
Soon...I will face my fears and blog about the uncomfortable place of the uncontrollable, hapless journey of my last birth so that I can stop thinking, cease knowing, and start healing inside again.
4 comments:
I'm sorry that the birth didn't go as you may have chosen. I am interested in reading the birth/recovery story...
I have walked a similar journey and look forward to reading more about yours. It may help my continued healing process...four years in the making.
writing things down is a great healing process for me. ..good luck in the continued healing process!
I've shared some of my thoughts on this already via email, but I just wanted to remind you that these feelings are not unusual and that you are not alone in facing this struggle. We love you!
Post a Comment