Manners?

Does your child have proper manners? Check the checklist

July 19th, 2011 @ 6:30pm

By Brooke Walker

SALT LAKE CITY — Recently, Dr. David Lowry published an online article that had parenting circles abuzz. He outlined 25 manners every child should know by the age of 9.

Some were obvious, like please, thank you and excuse me. But just how on track are most 9-year-olds? We went straight to the source to test it out.

Related:

25 manners every child should learn before age 9 Helping your child master these simple rules of etiquette will get him noticed -- for all the right reasons.

We clued in early on an "easy bribe" for our group of 8- almost 9-year-old test subjects: Buy them a McDonald's Happy Meal, and they were more than willing to talk — just not with their mouths full.

"Don't slurp," Maddy Hansen warned emphatically. "It will annoy other people who are trying to eat."

Her friends had other offering of good advice.

"Answer the phone politely, don't yell at people," said Greta Asay.

"Don't put your elbows on the table," cautioned Zoee Perry.

Rex Bell had a reminder for anyone enjoying a performance: "If you're phone is ringing, you should turn it off or not answer it."

While they were right on in their interpretation and comprehension of manners, etiquette blogger Janine Ottley says there are many people still playing catch up.

Want to teach manners?

If you're looking at David Lowry's list of 25 manners and thinking your child could use some help, here is a list of children's books written to teach manners:

• "Time to say Please" by Mo Willems
• "Mary Louise Loses her Manners" by Diane Cuneo
• "Manners Can be Fun" by Munro Leaf
• "Dear Miss Perfect" by Sandra Dutton
• "365 Manners Kids Should Know" by Sheryl Eberly

"Our culture forgot that these things are important. We're now playing catch-up because there is a whole new generation out there that does not have good manners," she said.

After reviewing Dr. Lowry's list, she felt a few points really popped to the top.

• If a door is shut? Knock.

  "I think it does show respect when. If a door is closed, they know there is a reason for that door being closed," Ottley agreed.

• Answering the phone politely.

  Ottley helps her kids learn the drill by signing them up for "Grandma Phone Camp."

  "My mom will spend the day for each particular child calling and training my kids to answer the phone properly," she explains. "And so for my household, they will call and my kids need to say, ‘Hello. Ottley's. This is 'so-and-so' speaking.'"

• Sitting through a performance.

  Barring any physical or emotional issues, Ottley says most 9-years-olds should be able to stick it out. "I think taking them out or making excuses makes it a lot more difficult to teach that."

More than just providing parental satisfaction, Ottley believes these simple skills will translate into life success.

"These are skills. No one will have to teach them, and I know will be impressive in the workplace and everywhere else they are," Ottley said. "I'm raising young ladies and young men with manners. It makes a huge difference."

Email: bwalker@ksl.com